$$$

We went to the submarine museum thing yesterday and he showed me the inside of the sub. The tiny bunks, the tiny kitchen, the engine room etc. Made my heart hurt that people have to live inside of them for months at a time..it's disgusting. I don't think one's mind can ever come back from that. When we were near the engine room he said that he was sitting there when they were told that they were going out to sea sooner than anticipated. He told me that that was the patrol that his life was ruined. He finally admitted to me why he did everything he did in the Navy. He said that Meghan had 90% to do with his fall from grace, that she hurt him more than he thought anyone could. I then told him that she's married now. I told him that I was hesitant to tell him because I didn't want to hurt him. He told me that he didn't care, that she was a long time ago and everything is fine now.

I also made the point to tell him that I love him very much and that everything he does I am proud of him.

Here comes the obnoxious part.

I had to ask him for $200 yesterday so that I could go grocery shopping and get some stuff before his mom goes home. At first he said yes that's fine, then a few hours later he asked me why I needed that much and that food doesn't cost that much and that I don't need all of that. He finally gave it to me but still. Then I told him that for my birthday I want a Keurig, which is kinda expensive but that's all I want. He said no. WTF. After bitching about not having any money he then wanted to buy a brand new Droid. Are you joking? Even though I made a point to say many times that I hate asking him for money, he said he didn't mind...if you really don't mind..you don't act that way.

I love him, I really do but I need to find a job so that I don't have to depend on him at least monitarily.